What About Your Friends: Walking in True Kindness
When I think of biblical womanhood, one aspect that comes to mind is the importance of friendship. In the Bible, we learn about the relationship between Naomi and Ruth. We learn that Naomi lost both of her sons, one of them being the husband of Ruth. Naomi requested that her daughters-in-law return to their homes. Orpah eventually decided to go back to her own mother’s homeland, but Ruth decided to stay with Naomi. She understood that Naomi could not guarantee her marriage as she was too old to have more children. Ruth knew the cost of her willingness to stay connected to Naomi. Yet, her love for her mother-in-law, her friend, allowed her to choose community.
Both women were grieving. One grieved the loss of both of her sons, while the other grieved the loss of her husband. It is written in Ruth 1 that Naomi was grieved, so much so that she no longer desired to be called Naomi. She wanted to be called Mara, which meant bitter. Naomi had allowed what hurt her, what had broken her, to change her name. How often do we allow our circumstances to change our name, to change what we respond to, and to change how we see God? Yet, in her woundedness, Ruth did not leave her side.
There is something beautiful about friends staying the course in tough seasons. Ruth could have left and started her life over without Naomi, yet love allowed her to stay. The kindness and patience of a friend matter in every season. It matters when life is beautiful and when it's rough. The true test of friendship is not based upon highs but on how people show up for you and how you show up for others in seasons of difficulty. Are you able to extend the Fruit of the Spirit when it's not comfortable or easy? Do you know that staying the course allows you to not only become the Fruit of the Spirit, but it also allows you to reap fruit. Ruth’s decision to stay with Naomi allowed her to meet Boaz. Naomi’s love for Ruth allows her to impart wisdom to Ruth that changed the trajectory of her life. Ruth’s marriage to Boaz created the lineage to Jesus.
I often wonder what would have occurred if Ruth had decided to leave Naomi to live among her people alone? How would she have been treated? How would the story unfold? I don't find it strange that we don't hear about Orpah again in the book of Ruth or even in the Bible itself. This is not to say that her decision to return to her own people was wrong, but the difference in responses is very clear. The book of Ruth was so powerful and impactful that it is still widely referenced today. It is still taught in bible studies and as sermon topics on Sunday mornings.
The story of Ruth, Naomi, and Boaz is a story that covers many lessons, but I specifically wanted to highlight that it is one of redemption. It is a story of breakthroughs. It is a reminder that the reward of our obedience may not be in that exact moment, but it does have a lasting effect. I believe that kindness is listed within the makeup of the Fruit of the Spirit, because it requires individuals to move beyond themselves and not allow feelings to rule. It does not remove the human experience, nor does it reduce it. It instead invites us to choose Christ. It is an opportunity for God to be glorified. Kindness is not always easy; it is not always our first choice or even our first response, but it is within the character of Christ. If we are to mirror God, to be in His image, then kindness must be within our DNA.
To be a friend is to journey together. It is to choose love on purpose and without apology. It is to be willing to cover and keep one another in prayer, to share the word, and to provide support. Just as a marriage is a covenant, so is a kingdom-centered friendship. Friendships rooted in biblical faith are not always easy. There are highs and lows and stretching seasons. As we grow in our own personal walks, we must understand that some friendships may change or end. Some are seasonal, and some are permanent. Yet, God is a provider. I believe that even when our seasons of friendship change, God still hears the prayers of his daughters. We were not created to live alone. Biblical womanhood is not without community. It is not without showing up for others. It is not without love. It does not void compassion, gentleness, or grace. It is not empty of kindness. To be kind is to be a direct reflection, to be in alignment with our Lord. God is Kind.
